The Monkey King's Used Primate Emporium and Book Reviews

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Chris Claremont AND Ellen Forney, (Multiple Titles)

Started March 23 � Finished March 24, 2004; 416 pages. Posted 15 April 2004

Hello? Hello? Is this thing on? Uh, it�s my birthday in 3 days and still nobody has bothered to buy my book, which is the same as getting me a present AND will help make room in my house! Come on, I know all of you don�t have this book yet! I need your money if I want to get drunk on my birthday, �cause I don�t think anyone will actually buy me a drink!

Anyhoo, the X-men title proves to me that sometimes, no matter how much I like to think I avoid things that are over-hyped, I still manage to pick things up on name brand alone. This has three name brands: Marvel Comics, X-men, and Chris Claremont, who wrote the basic story line that�s being used in the X-men films. That�s a lot of things that one, I know, and two, I know I like.

Or at least I thought I did. I remember some of the Claremont issues from when I was a child, particularly the ones involving the Sentinels (whom I hope and pray show up in the third film). I thought this was a collection of those issues.

As it turns out, it�s another collection utilized to try and boost sales through multiple titles (like Secret Wars, reviewed in 2003).

What I don�t understand is if they�re making a big ballyhoo about a series run, why don�t they make it any good? This was just silly, and I felt like a sucker fanboy buying this, even if I did get it cheaper than anybody else.

The Girlfriend, who saw me reading this (and can�t make fun of me for being a geek, as I read it while she spent three hours playing Monster Rancher 3), tried to push one of her independent comic artists on me. She said she really liked this one by Forney, and I got the idea of doing one of those compare/contrast things with the small press cartoonists and the Marvel juggernaut.

Of course, when she heard that, she wanted to give me a different book that she thought I�d like better. By then I had already started this one, and didn�t want to start all over.

I could see her point. This is a collection of homespun stories from Forney�s life as a child in the seventies. And while it was cute, and as I was close to the same age, I remember some of the things she�s writing about (though surprisingly not much, despite both me and Forney having pseudo-hippie parents).

But there�s not enough of a narrative to really get into — some are short stories with little drawings accompanying them, but when I got through the book, I was reminded about some people who will launch into long involved stories that have no point, aren�t funny, and aren�t relevant to anything.

I�ve never quite figured these people out. Are they afraid that if they stop talking, their brain will freeze up? This isn�t like that. With Forney, who is syndicated in some alternative newspapers, I think she sometimes runs out of ideas, and so retells the story of the time her mom and her went out to lunch and she caught a butterfly.

Great. Thanks for sharing.

That makes me sound harsher toward the book than I mean to be. Was the book cute? Sure. Was it funny? Occasionally. Was it poignant? It had its moments. Would I want to continue reading her stuff to find out what she did when she was eight? Probably not. If I wanted a random story with no discernable point, I could go to work.

Or read this Web site.


Rating: X-men � Library material. Forney � Worth working in a used bookstore and getting cheap.

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