The Monkey King's Used Primate Emporium and Book Reviews

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Ralph Steadman, �The Grapes of Ralph�

Started February 1 � Finished February 8, 2006; 224 pages. Posted 22 March 2006

Standard plug first of all, because I got another article in the Honolulu Weekly, which can be found by clicking here.

It�s an odd gig, running around to various drinking establishments and figuring out what and how to write about them. I found this particular place by jumping in my car and heading East, stopping at the first place that I knew hadn�t been covered already and also had a place to park, which isn�t easy to find on this island. So I saw the sign, hooked a right, walked in and was struck with the site of five lonely old souls parked around the bar sharing the microphone to belt out karaoke of old crooner hits gone by.

�Oh Christ,� I thought, �How the hell am I going to get this into a paper for a column designated for the early thirties hipster crowd?� The answer? Observe and see how it might be interesting for that demographic.

Not that this involved any sort of genius on my part. I just knew that I had already purchased one beer, so I was now morally bound to get paid for it. I can�t afford to just check things out, hoping to come across a story. And no, I don�t get reimbursed for drinks, making it all the more imperative that I get a story out of wherever I show up.

O, to have some sense of fame attached to my name like Ralph Steadman. Just in case you�ve been living under a rock, Steadman was already considered an up-and-coming artist when he was assigned to illustrate a few pieces for Hunter Thompson, including �The Kentucky Derby is Decadent and Depraved,� and what ultimately lead to �Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas.�

Some people may have never got past that high water mark, receding into eventual obscurity. Hell, it probably wouldn�t matter. I�m sure his residuals from those books have made him set for life. But being a footnote to somebody else was not for Ralph. He kept up the productivity, doing various illustrations, movie posters, gallery work, and even a line of beer labels. He passed the title of �Illustrator of Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas� to simply Ralph Steadman because he was well known enough to stand on his own name.

Which of course means those last two paragraphs were totally superfluous.

Several other art collections went by, most revolving around a theme such as �America,� or the �Scar Strangled Banger.� Hell, I have a collection that consists of nothing more than illustrations of Hunter Thompson�s cat.

And then the bastard had to show that he could actually write as well. Soon he had his own books, covering subjects from Sigmund Freud to Leonardo Da Vinci. I have no way of knowing for sure, but it feels like his editors now just walk up meekly, hands clasped low, and ask what he would like to do for his next book.

It also feels like he�s been willing to fuck with said editors.

�You know,� I can picture him saying in a high, proper, English measured tone, �I think I�d like to research the history of whiskey.� And so he did. Then he suggested the same trip though time with wine. Which he did.

Good job if you can get it. Better than ambling into a karaoke lounge, anyway.


Rating: Worth used.

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